Cracked

You think you have your day all planned out, then something happens. 

I had just closed my front porch storm door after seeing my grass cutter guy off, when I heard a loud pop over my shoulder and what sounded like shards of glass tinkling to the floor. My, what could that be? I looked back at the door and saw that it had shattered into a bazillion pieces. More breaking was happening as I was watching. Sections of the pane were popping and splintering, all on their own. New cracks of all kinds and lines and shapes continued to appear, along with accompanying splitting noises. Chunks were falling to the floor in turns. I watched for a moment while the slivers fell and smashed some more once they hit the ceramic tile floor. So weird! Felt like an indie movie.

To be honest though, while I thought it looked really cool and like nothing I had ever seen before, I kinda wished it was happening at someone else’s house.

No matter. I closed the main door to keep more fragments from falling into the house. And I helped the glass still remaining in the door along by poking it out of the door. Get this thing over with, I thought. I pulled the main door over so that it was almost shut, and poked the rest of the glass out with the end of a broom. Smashed glass everywhere.

Okay, next is “Safety first!”I suited up, wearing:

• Leather gloves (must have been the cheap kind, cuz I still got cut (I’m fine!)),
• Eye protection (well, swimming goggles), and
• Sensible shoes.

I continued jabbing the glass out of the door. It was a serious amount. I swept it up with the broom. You have no idea how much glass these doors hold until it lies in chips on your floor and walkway. Next I had to wrestle out the now-empty frame that held the glass. A butter knife to the rescue! I pried the plastic parts that anchored the frame out of their snug spots. Now, the frame was empty. The easy part was over. But how to dispose of all this mess? I couldn’t just throw it in the trash. Some unsuspecting sanitation worker might end up with a giant slash when he least expected it. That is so not okay!

I found a couple of cardboard boxes to put the glass in. I bent and mangled the frame and wrapped it in bubble wrap. I taped everything tight.

I swept the glass from inside and outside the house. Then I vacuumed it up. Felt pretty strange to be running the vacuum cleaner over my front yard.

Next I measured the glass space and went on line to order replacement panel for the door. The company said it would be delivered in three days. What a country! 

In the meantime, there is a gaping hole in my door where the glass used to be. When the main door is open I can walk right through the hole to get into my house. It’s kinda fun. It’s like something your mother would never let you do when you were little. So I walked in and out a bunch of times. And again and again. And even one more time when I knew someone was looking.

Never figured out what set off the giant glass adventure. The replacement will be here soon, though, and I can’t wait to install it. 

And from now on, I’m using the back door.